Almost 3 years ago, I was diagnosed with conversion disorder. Upon looking through my entire health file, my family doctor concluded I was having episodes since I was 3 years old. I never knew the cause until late this summer. My mom finally spoke out. I have been neglected as a toddler. She was herself suffering from depression at that time. I don’t know all the details and still has no memories of that time. She told me if she hadn’t seek help, this would have ended really badly. She never really told anyone either, or they would have taken me away from her. The only moment she was taking care of me and was nice (i guess) was when I was sick. It was, for me, as a toddler, the only way to survive. This mechanism stayed though. And I can’t lie knowing the truth makes me suffer even more. But now I finally understand why. Why I’m the way I am. And how strong I was, am, and will be. Wow…writing this down to a complete stranger kinda relieve me a bit. The rest of my family doesn’t know…and they never will. And despite all that, I still love my mom, very deeply.

What Gaming Means To Me

I love anything about gaming. It’s a wonderful media to tell a story. And everything about game conception, makes me feel so relaxed…so free. I’m a very creative being.

Jennifer Hazel

I'm a psychiatry doctor and passionate gamer. I run a resource called - an interface between video games and mental health.
This is a space for gamers to safely share their feelings, access personalised resources, and seek help without judgement or stigma.