Aspergers for me wasn’t a problem until I turned 13.

Up until then I had a few friends, but as I grew older I found it harder and harder to make other friends until suddenly I changed schools and found that I was alone. I didn’t care at first, especially since I still seemed “normal” in middle school, but when I came to highschool it became highly apparent. I eventually learned to look normal as long as you didn’t actually talk to me, but sadly people are curious and I soon got a reputation for being the weirdo or being mentally retarded after I accidentally sat at their table and didn’t have the heart to immediately leave and make them feel bad.

I’ve since graduated and while I still don’t have any companions and still look strange in public I’ve learned to be comfortable alone.

What Gaming Means To Me

League of Legends was very helpful for me during my high school years because it was something I felt good at even when my grades were falling and people openly commented about the number of “weird” kids in the school whenever I passed by. It especially helped that I could hide behind my username and currently used avatar so no one knew how strange and awkward I was. Even when someone actually told me to kill myself because of a small mistake, I felt safe in the knowledge that it was never actually personal.

In multiplayer games that I’m good at, gaming helps me feel useful and important. In singleplayer games they usually serve to keep my mind from wandering to it favorite place: my various embarrassments and failures over the years.

by @Ninjapus

Jennifer Hazel

I'm a psychiatry doctor and passionate gamer. I run a resource called - an interface between video games and mental health.
This is a space for gamers to safely share their feelings, access personalised resources, and seek help without judgement or stigma.